…I have no excuse

Wow I realized today that I have not updated this thing in a while and I really have no excuse.  I could say well I have been so busy – work, life, other miscellaneous tasks, but in reality I have been sitting at my computer mindlessly playing games instead of writing.

Couple life updates:

– Update 1: Recently I got what is called a FAB award at my work which basically means I went above and beyond my job description.  This is really exciting because it feels like I am being recognized for my hard work and assisting with now three programs outside of the one I solo run, but also no one at my work takes FAB awards seriously and so it was just laughed off and besides the email that went out no coworkers said congrats.  On the plus side I did get 150 dollar gift card which went towards a lovely game haul.

– Update 2: I can apply to take my licensure exam in March since I started working at my current place of employment at that time. 😀 hopefully big things will happen at that point in time

Touchy feely moment of the day.  I have a pretty great life.  Bills get paid, I can furnish my home with items I choose instead of hand me downs, and the people I have around me are wonderful.  I think back to even two years ago and its hard to imagine that even two years ago I didn’t have some amazing people in my life.  It is amazing how things such as life and just taking a chance and having an open mind changes so much.  If I hadn’t opened my mine and formed my own opinion one of the best people I know would not be in my life, that is sad and so scary to think about.

I guess I have been feeling retrospective recently.  I practically bumped into a college roommate this week at the grocery store and it was awkward.  We didn’t end on good terms, we were such good friends and then her friends started threatening me and saying really hurtful things so 2 months before end of year I moved out of my dorm room had my family come back up my room and lived on a sorority house futon (spoilers I wasn’t a member of a sorority).  After that she blamed or her friends blamed me for stealing things and I eventually had to get the police involved for harassing me. Fast forward and she ended up working at the same place as my hubby and claims she never knew why I moved out or that her friends were threatening me. I had talked to her about it on Facebook and nothing ever felt settled.  At the grocery store I wanted so badly to go up and just say hi but I couldn’t I had overwhelming anxiety that I basically turned and went the opposite direction before I melted down into an anxiety attack.

Why is it so difficult to face your demons, even when you thought those demons were long behind you.  I am not angry at this roommate anymore, and she very well may never have known what her friends were doing.  Perhaps its the fear that she would just reject even saying hi back that had me dodging away, who knows.  What I did realize though even though I don’t think I could ever personally go up to her is that it feels good to not be angry anymore, the thought that I should go say hi, even though it won’t happen, is empowering.  Realizing that I have let it go, and moved on, is something that is freeing, and I hope that one day others can let go of their anger towards people, and realize that even if you never face that person again, being angry at them, it just hurts you.

~Reave

Food: http://damndelicious.net/2014/12/31/lemon-butter-chicken/ (give it a shot it is delicious and I used Quorn pieces for mine and it was yummy, would make with rolls because the sauce was way to good to be wasted in bottom of the pan)

Music: I’m Sorry but with the whole letting anger go thing this is in my head (consider revisiting your Disney collection for music) 

– No Art but how about a game: Sorry I have been playing a lot of games lately, and a review will come later for this game, but didn’t want to do two game reviews in a row – go play HEROES OF THE STORM…seriously go right now.

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